Friday, August 04, 2006

Just made it

It might bye the nd of the world. You know, the Rapture, End of Days and iI'm not talking porno or the latest Arnold movie. No I'm talking about the big "A." Armaggedon. As in "I'ma gedon" tired of all the end of the world, come to the big mixer to meet Jesus stories on cable. Jon Stewart just covered this topic inluding Paula Zahn's talk about the "Rapture meter" hitting "156!" I kid you not. But I'm not talking about the war in the Middle East but of the "Masturbate-a-thon" going on in London. And again, I kid you not.

Marie Stopes International, which is hosting the event with HIV/ AIDS charity the Terrence Higgins Trust, said it expected up to 200 people to attend the sponsored masturbation session in Clerkenwell, central London, on Saturday. "It is a bit of a publicity stunt but we hope it will raise awareness," a Marie Stopes spokeswoman told Reuters. "We want to get people talking about safer sex, masturbation and to lift taboos." Participants, who have to be over 18, can bring any aids they need and can take part in four different rooms -- a comfort area, a mixed area, along with men and women only areas. However, the rules on the event's Web site states there can be no touching of other participants nor are people allowed to fake orgasms. "The amount you raise will be determined by how many minutes you masturbate and/or how many orgasms you achieve," the Web site said. The Marie Stopes spokeswoman said local religious groups had been initially outraged, but after people had heard what the event was about, most had approved it. Similar events have been staged in San Francisco for the last six years raising $25,000 for women's health initiatives and HIV prevention. If successful, Marie Stopes said it could take place elsewhere in mainland Europe next year.

One way or the other, Middle East war, AIDS, Bird Flu, Global Warming, Masterbate-a-thon, whatever your pleasure, it is the end of the world. I'm just glad that when that happens i won't be the only one eternally cranky.


Blogger Intellectual Insurgent said...

Maybe the Semitic World would be a happier place if they held masturbate-athons.

3:04 PM  
Blogger Crankyboy said...

Yes, I'm sure lap dances and strip clubs in Baghdad are the next moves of the U.S. government. It makes as much sense as anything else they've done.

3:47 PM  

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