Unplugged

When you're on vacation you get unplugged from the Matrix. The kiddies want to watch Dora the Explorer and you fetch their breakfast and clothes like you're Jeeves the butler. Then it's off to the beach of golf course or lunch or visiting relatives. When you realize you haven't read a paper or watched CNN in hours you get this weird feeling like the world could be blowing up and you wouldn't know. Then you realize that anything short of the world blowing up doesn't really mean much when you are trying to make that birdie put on the par three 7th. (Missed on the amateur side.) Playing on an empty course with a caddie at a club where Dan Marino won the club championship two years in a row makes you forget about, not care is the better phrase, what's going on in the real world. When you're slowly playing 17 and your caddie says, "Oh look, there's Jesper Parnevik teeing off on 16" well then even if the world is blowing up you don't care in the least.

So it's easy to go through the day without seeing any news, unless you call Miss USA going in to rehab after begging The Donald (on her knees? Won't even go there - oops, I just did) to not take away her tiara. CNN spelling it "tiera" made me realize that if they can't even spell why should I listen to anything they say? So I watched Mike Rowe of "Dirty Jobs" climb through sewers and chip cement from the inside of a cement truck and spraying bug poison all over a church and some in his mouth and eyes and thought, "it's not so bad being unplugged from reality." News and reality are no match for Jesper Parnevik and war against termites. It's easier on the brain and won't raise your blood pressure. Let me know what's going on in the real world. At this point I don't care much.