Where am I?

The President held a press conference and was asked about spending billions of dollars on oil and gas subsidies which amounted to welfare for the rich. Another reporter, although not from Fox News, stood to ask a question of the President and simply said "I was hoping when you arrived I would share my pain with you. Now I have no pain in my heart, only happiness." Sound like a typical press conference at the White House? Guess again. It's from Tehran and the President is President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

Back in this country, or at least what I think is this country, well actually Salt Lake City, Utah which is really another country, a local defense attorney is going to hold a "Death to Israel" demonstration. The lawyer, Robert Breeze, 52, said his goal is to protest "the torture and murder inflicted on Muslims by Israel and the penetration of the U.S. media by Israeli intelligence." While he said his group - the Center to Prevent Corporate Media Lying - has other members and financial donors, Breeze wouldn't name them.

Then of course there is Republican Congresswoman Mullah Katherine Harris (R-FL), who, while setting new standards for imploding political campaigns, recently said, "We have to have the faithful in government and over time, that lie we have been told, the separation of church and state, people have internalized, thinking that they needed to avoid politics and that is so wrong because God is the one who chooses our rulers." Guess God voted early for Sen. Bill Nelson (D-FL). Asked to explain why Baptists in Florida should care about the election, Harris said the fate of Western civilization depends on it, telling the religious publication, "If you're not electing Christians, then in essence you are going to legislate sin. And that will take Western civilization, indeed other nations because people look to our country as one nation as under God, and whenever we legislate sin and we say abortion is permissible and we say gay unions are permissible, then average citizens who are not Christians, because they don't know better, we are leading them astray and it's wrong."

She has tried to back away from those comments but stuck her other annointed foot into her mouth when she was asked whether the U.S. should be a secular country, Harris said: "I think that our laws, I mean, I look at how the law originated, even from Moses, the 10 Commandments. And I don't believe, that uh . . . That's how all of our laws originated in the United States, period. I think that's the basis of our rule of law." Uh-huh. I guess if you worship a statue of Shiva while watching Da Bears on a Friday night and shout "Jesus Christ!" in anger while disobeying your parents to turn off the game all the while coveting your neighbor's wife and plasma screen you are breaking many, many laws since:

1. You shall have no other Gods before me.
2. You shall not worship idols.
3. You shall not take the Lord's name in vain.
4. You shall keep the Sabbath holy.
5. You shall honor they mother and father.
6. You shall not covet your neighbor's house or wife.

I'd say you should get the death penalty but "Thou shall not kill" right?

So I ask again. Where am I? Iran or the U.S.